Don’t pick on our favoured Camilla –
My year had her outside the villa.
Oh God, what a blast.
Left all at half mast.
She said “Wow, it tastes like vanilla.!”
Flashman, indeed! You claim him,
That sneaky surveyor of quim?
His di’ry I’ve read
I think what he said
Are subjects quite fit for a lim!
My great-uncle Flash was a cad
With ladies he was quite a lad.
Despite his great shame
My hero became.
Is that why I’m evil and bad?
Ærchie Flashman 1998